Archives for the day of: April 11, 2011

the times, catering to its demographic, published the summary of a recent research on parenting. according to the times the “gist” of the article is “older parents are happier than younger parents”! according to the mentioned studies, folks who have offspring over the age of 40 are happier than parents in their 20s. or teenage parents. such revelation! i am soo glad someone finally spent tens of thousands on research and finally figured this correlation out.

how obvious can a study get? why do you spend money to research something like this to begin with? of course older parents are happier because they have offspring. of course teenage parents or parents in their 20s are miserable. of course parenting will be a bigger pleasure when you lived longer and fulfilled many of your dreams. if you’re in your 20s and are slapped with offspring, of course it will make you miserable, at least at some level, and make you long for how you would have lived your 20s, even your 30s, without an offspring tagging along. all those travels, adventures, possible career moves and changes, personal development, education you may have to forgo because you are now responsible for a kid? come on, how obvious can you get?

saw a couple in their early 40s the other day. typical white park slope professional couple: with a pair of in vitro twins, spitting image of them, an asian daughter, apparently a purchase and a back up in case the in vitro twins did not pan out as worthy offspring, and an ethnic nanny, obviously for the offspring’s second language, tagging along. they were happy as clams. another couple, this time black and in their early 20s, not so much…

well, it is obvious for our modern western society, isn’t it? offspring later in life will bring more personal satisfaction than offspring earlier in life. this may not be true for developing countries where there is no joy in the entire shebang, it is just a natural occurrence of life, but it is true for our modern society.

needless to say it was one of the most emailed articles on the times style section this sunday. or teenage parents. an expensive and needless study but a perfect self-affirmation for the times’ demographic.

apparently there is a serial killer on the loose in long island. he is targeting prostitutes he finds on craigslist. a serial killer is no laughing matter. but, how the cops are perceiving this particular ted bundy really is. according to a recent ny times article, the cops think that the killer may be someone from law enforcement, either active or former, because he knows how cops think and is careful in not living traces.

they reached this conclusion because this dude called the victims’ families from crowded areas like the penn station with burn phones knowing that the cctv cameras will not be able to pick him up in such crowded areas and the cops will not be able to trace the burn phones.

here is an alternate theory for you investigating officers: perhaps the killer is not former or active law enforcement but a dedicated tv viewer? maybe the guy watched an episode of CSI (you pick the name of the city)? or another episode of law & order SVU? or, if he is really technologically advanced 24, or, if he has premium cable the wire? how about that?

screw the police academy, those shows give you the blueprint for committing crimes and getting away with it. if you think about everything they use to catch criminals and act accordingly, you will not be caught. like not calling your victim’s sister from your own cell phone and your mother’s family plan in front of a security camera in a deserted street in broad daylight.

you follow what CSI teaches you, which is probably beyond what a standard police department would utilize for all its cases (i’m sure the way they investigate on TV is way too expensive for most crimes) then you’ll get away with it.

or you will never commit a crime. what you see on TV, even though some of the technology TV law enforcement utilizes may be too expensive or wishful thinking, would make any smart person paranoid. achieving a perfect crime is not as easy as it was in your granddaddy’s day. so, kids, don’t commit a crime. unless you’re a mensa member and extremely “smart”—if so, knock yourself out… go get your guns mensa morons and let’s see darwin and natural selection in action…

but, if you were too stoned while watching CSI, or if you lived your entire life without the warm and deep teachings of a TV, then you’re in trouble buddy.

and that brings us to my second issue with the article and the serial killer investigation. according to the article, one investigator even exclaimed: “without question, this guy is smart, this guy is not a dope,” and continued, “it’s a guy who thinks about things”.

“not a dope” and “a guy who thinks about things”? oh my… the cops are really caught between a rock and hard place in this one, didn’t they? yeah, a dope and a guy who doesn’t think they can handle and they cherish. but not a dope and thinks about things? oh, you better watch out!

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